When your marriage is on the brink, you may find yourself panicking. The goal is not to freak out if you want to save it.
Here are 6 things for you to focus on outside of just trying to remain calm:
There is no quick solution, so do not spend time trying to find one. It took time to develop and will take time to resolve what is leading your marriage to be on the brink.
Confide in 1-2 friends, but not everyone you know. The more voices that get involved, the harder this can become. Whether it's a friend, a family member, or your therapist, be selective with who you share the status of your marriage. Choose those who want to help you figure out what you need and want to assist your marriage in being saved.
Practice self-care. Identify your healthy coping skills and intentionally implement them in your life. Hang with your friends, read for fun, and move your body. Keep your brain and body occupied.
Be there for your kids-young and grown-up. Do not pull back from them. *Do not choose to let them be your confidant in all of this too. Boundary what you share and protect their emotional and mental health too.*
If your spouse is confused, avoid getting into long conversations where you want clarity. It tends to make you feel worse and push your spouse farther away.
Know that your spouse also needs time and space to think. This is challenging for them too.
Saving your marriage is not easy. Try your best to follow the 6 tips above. It may feel counter to what your instincts are saying. Your best chance is NOT to add more emotion and drama to the situation.
Are you and your spouse ready for support? Click here to read more about Discernment Counseling.