On February 15th, 2019 I finally found out I achieved full licensure as a mental health therapist. I was in a really bad mood after fi
nding out a project I was working really hard on had to be put to a stop. I was frustrated, disappointed and struggling to enjoy the day. I submitted my application to be licensed in January of 2019 and I checked the department of health's website every day until February 15th. Eventually I got use to seeing the page saying "pending" and on February 15th I expected the same thing to happen. I was so surprised when it said "ACTIVE" and I felt an instant head rush of Joy! I had to keep checking the page because I honestly couldn't believe it was real.
One of the hardest parts of graduating with your masters degree is to discover that you still have to invest quite a bit of time before you can be fully licensed. You work so hard to get that degree, finally get it, and then are told to work even harder to achieve the final destination. I was set on becoming licensed as quickly as possible and worked very hard to get my hours. I had six years to get my hours and I did it in 1 year and 10 months. Why? I'm not really sure. I had an intense amount of internal pressure to get it over with and I wasn't really able to breathe until I did.
The internal pressure on myself is just one way that my anxiety shows up in my life. I am a high achiever and I am constantly seeking how I can grow and develop more. It's a strength and a challenge. I feel stressed often because I do not enjoy slowing down. I find it difficult to rest and allow myself to sit in my accomplishments. I tackle the accomplishment and move onto the next.
I am writing this the day after I found out I achieved this accomplishment and I am finding myself thinking what is next already. What comes after this achievement? What should I dive into next? To be honest, what should come next is pouring into my relationships. I've been so focused on working and achieving in this realm that I have not been the best at developing the relationships in my life. Relationship with my husband, with friends, with family and with myself.
I don't think you ever accomplish or achieve relationships, but I do believe you can grow and develop relationships. I also believe it is so important to pour into your relationships that bring you love and joy because at the end of the day they are what remains. The plaque on the wall does not matter at the end of your life, the piece of paper naming you are licensed, or even winning the lottery. What truly matters are the people who are there through it all with you.
If you are a high achiever I want to challenge you to take that energy and pour it into your relationships. Find the beauty, joy and love the people in your life can bring to you.